Squirrel Is In

This kids got some serious problems...

Today C-man went to see the psychiatrist. 

He immediatly started talking like a baby.

He tried to act like he had no clue why he was there.

He was asked about his mothers drug use and he said that the marijuana he found in her room was really cabbage and he put it in her room.

Whe he was asked about his mother abusing him he said he had no memory of it but when pushed he got mad and said "but it was only a small vacumm she threw at me, only two pounds!".

When asked why he was mad he said that it was because he wanted to stay at his mothers two weeks and his dads two weeks because he doesn't have time to have fun with his friends at his mothers over only a weekend.

In the car on the way there out of the dead silence with Boston playing in the background he said "If I promise to stop lying about you guys, will you promise not to make me get a hair cut?  Because I want to grow my hair long.".

The psychiatrist said he doesn't need meds right now but he referred him to a therapist with a PHD.  The next appointment is on January 24.

I'm numb with fear for the future.

My eyes are swelled almost shut....

My emotions are all over the place.  Today I can't stop crying because I am so heartbroken.  I just cannot believe he started lying about me.  One minute I just want to move out into my own apartment with T-man to get away from this nightmare. The next I want to just get him back and put him into counseling or maybe an in-patient facility for children.  My mother-in-law suggested that.  Not that I hadn't thought it already, I just hadn't said it out-loud.  My stepson (today I don't know what to call him.  C-man was a term of endearment on this blog and Damien sounds so harsh) is showing signs (more obvious signs) of mental illness or severe emotional problems at the very least, everyday.  His mother is getting a check from SSI for mental illness and so is my husbands real mother.  Maybe he has inherited something.  Or maybe living with his mother for the first 7 years of his life has done such damage that... well I don't want to think it is permanent but it seems like nothing and no amount of love is changing it.  He just seems to be getting more troubled and dangerous.  He absolutely knows what these kind of accusations could do.  We have told him that if his mother tries to get him to lie about us to tell us immediately because one of us could be thrown into prison, that we could lose our jobs and our home.  Yet he went over there and started making false child abuse accusations.  It just seems so pathological, calculating and down right... evil (for lack of a better word). 

Damien, formerly known as C-man...

What happened the other night is a sign that 2007 will officially be the worst year on record or a sign that 2008 is going to be the worst year ever.  I pray it is the latter, but honestly believe I'm wrong about that.

C-man (my stepson) is now going to be called Damien on this blog.  Forgive me folks if I sound harsh in this post but the pain of THE GIANT KNIFE IN MY HEART betrayal by Damien is still fresh.   Remember Damien is going to be 9 years old next month.  He is not a baby.  This is the kid who reached up our pastors teen age daughters shorts in bible school and grabbed her butt cheek.  For those of you new readers, we just got custody of him from his mother last year.  OK here it goes...

Christmas Eve his mother picked him up for her visitation.  She gets him from Dec 24th at 10pm until Jan. 6th.  This past Thursday night at 11:35pm just as my husband and I were getting ready for bed Damien calls.  He states very strongly that he "IS GOING TO LIVE WITH (HIS) MOTHER!".  He states, "And there's NOTHING  you (my husband) can do about it".  My husband tells him that he is only 9 years old and that he (my husband) has sole custody for a reason and that he (Damien) has no choice in the matter.  Damien starts screaming, "just you watch and see with your little eyes!".  My husband says what are you going to do start making up lies about us with your mother?  And he says VERY COLD BLOODED like, "if that's what it takes".  My husband says, "why do you want to live with your mother?"  That's when Damien started lying.  Oh wait first there was the list of things she gave him. 

1. She gave him a cell phone
2. She bought him a motorcycle
3. She GIVES HIM BATHS (sound familiar?)

THEN he starts lying.  ABOUT ME!!!!!!!!!!  He threw me under the bus, stabbed me in the back for a track phone and a battery operated motorcyle!!!!!!! He says that I spank him all the time!  I HAVE NEVER SPANKED THAT CHILD.  EVER!  On MANY occasions when I have called my husband at work to tell him things Damien has been doing, my husband has told me to spank him and I said "NO.  I have had DHS up my @#$% over here too many times because of the #$%^ lies his mother has told.  I AM NOT LAYING A HAND ON THAT KID".  I ALWAYS sent him to his room and if his dad wanted to spank him when he got home he did.  I DON'T SPANK OTHER PEOPLE'S CHILDREN.  But Damien is on the phone (on speaker) saying I spank him all the time and when I said, "I have never spanked you, Damien and you know it!"  AND THEN TO SHOVE THE KNIFE IN DEEPER Damien starts screaming that I'M a liar!!  He's screaming I'M a liar when both he and I know HE'S the one lying!!  Not one mention of the 100 spankings his dad has given him.  He just starts lying about ME.  I mean for GOD'S SAKE, he has enough stories about all the spankings he's gotten from his dad but NOT ONE MENTION of it!  He starts making up @#$% lies about ME!  He starts saying that I DRUG him across the house by his ear!!!  If I DRUG a 70 pound kid across this big house by his ear he would have had a busted ear drum or a bruised ear or a DETACTHED EAR!!  I am FURIOUS.  My husband says when he gets him home he's taking him to a psychiatrist (ABOUT TIME!).  But I am seriously going to need counseling to figure out how to live in the same house with that little lying, backstabbing child.  How am I going to hold my tongue from screaming "get away from me!!" when he tries to talk to me?  Prayer.  Lot's of prayer!

I'm calling my doctor on Wednesday and getting Valium.  Because I'm going to have to be sedated to live in this house with that kid. 

I'm sure that some of you are thinking this is just him repeating his EVIL MOTHER.  But the voice of that kid Thursday night sounded like it was ALL HIM with maybe a small pinch of her prodding.

Right now I am TERRIFIED of what those two (him and his mother) are going to do or say to the authorities so she can get him back.  I'm scared of him.  I told my husband if he comes back in this house he is to NEVER leave me alone with him.  I want a witness at all times!

Maybe next week I'll feel differently but for today...

I only have three children.